Adventures at the DMV
by Princess of Darkness
Summary: Read the title folks! It's another BrotherHood ficcy with Pietro as the main character. I've become a fan of them. ::sighs:: Not enough fics about them out there!
1. I have to name these?

* I'm back…again

* I'm back…again.Some day I shall get help for my sugar addiction, but till then here's some sugar induced madness!I guess I have to say I own nothing still.I now have a new muse and it's scaring me.::Cowers in fear of a random plush toy::Back Kero-chan Back!(Sorry…random CCS thing.^_^;; ) *

Adventures at the DMV 

By: **Princess of Darkness**

** **

Fred:"Why do we have to walk to school?"

Lance: (Glaring at Todd)"Maybe you should ask Todd that."

Todd:"Hey you're the one that was pulled over not me!"

Lance:"No, but YOU were chanting: _Show him some skin!He'll let you off if ya do!_"

Todd:"It always works in the movies though."

Lance:"That's because they were WOMEN."

Todd:"Oh yeah!I forgot that part for some reason."

Pietro:"Could it be his cross-dressing tendencies?" 

Lance:"Hey!You guys promised not to talk about that any more!"

Pietro:"Yeah…we promise a lot of things.Like no more stealing from lockers…"

Todd:"…And no more sending Mystique's furniture to other dimensions…"

Fred:"…And to stop stalking Jean…"

Pietro:"Now have we EVER stopped trying to do these things?No!" 

Todd:"Yeah…it was fun getting rid of Mystique's new car."(Sighs)"I wish that machine hadn't gotten squashed."

Fred:"Did she ever find out where her stuff went?"

Todd:"No.I wish a had gotten a picture when she walked in her office."

Lance:"OK guys I get the point."(Pauses for a moment)"What did you ask again Fred?"

Todd:"You mean you don't remember?It was only a few minutes ago."

Lance:"Guys thank to TV I can't remember what happened more than a few minutes in the past."

Todd, Fred, and Pietro begin to laugh at Lance.

Lance:"It's a serious problem…it's also the reason I say such crappy puns all the time."

Todd, Fred and Pietro continue to laugh.After a few moments Lance joins them forgetting what they were laughing about. 

Todd:"Ok I'm done laughing at Lance's pain now."

Fred:"Me too."

All continue walking to school. 

Pietro:"Man this bites!School's too far away!"

Lance:"Why don't you just run there with your super speed?Couldn't you be there in like under a minute?"

Pietro: "Yeah, but then I'd miss looking at your cute ass."

Lance: "WHAT?!!"

Pietro: (Sweat dropping) "I mean…uh…um…I'd miss looking at the cute grass.Yeah that's what I said."

Lance: (Raises an eyebrow)"You sure?"

Pietro begins petting a random lawn they were walking by to prove his point.

Pietro:"Yup!"

Random-Gun-Wielding-Home-Owner: "Git off my grass yah rapscallions!"

Fred, Lance, Todd, and Pietro: (Running away at top speed) "Ahhhhhhh!!"

The guys run far enough to get a few houses away from the Random-Gun-Wielding-Home-Owner.

Pietro:"That's it!I'm getting my license so we don't have to walk any more!"

Todd:"But by the time you get one Lance will be able to drive again."

Pietro: (Glaring at Todd)"Yeah so?"

Fred:"We won't need you to drive us around."

Pietro:"Yeah well I'm still gonna get it!" (Storms off in the opposite direction that school is)"And none of you can stop me!"

Lance:"But Pietro you're going in the wrong direction!"

Pietro:(Walking past them in the right direction)"I knew that!"

Fred:"Riiiight"

That's it for now folks!I'll write more if I get more sugar and reviews.^_~Toodles!


	2. I can't think of a name

* Yeah yeah I still own nothing

* Yeah yeah I still own nothing.You'd think people would realize that from the fact that it's called FAN FICTION. *

Adventures at the DMV 

By:Princess of Darkness

Now we are at the DMV (hence the title)

Pietro: (pushing past a line of people)"I want to learn to drive and there's nothing you fat cats can do to stop me!You hear me?!"

Lady:"That's nice sir, but this is where you register for group therapy for repressed cross-dressers.The next line over is where you apply for a license."

Pietro:"Oh…well I'd like to register here as well."

Lady:"Name please."

Pietro:"Evan Daniels…That's spelled D-A-N-I-E-L-S.Got that?"

Lady:"Thank you and I hope your therapy goes well!"

Pietro:(Walking towards the other line) "Mwahahahaha!"

Scott:(Walking up to the cross-dresser line) "Damn…there's always a line."

Pietro:"Summers?!"

Scott: "AHHHHH!"

Scott runs out of the building screaming.

Pietro:"I'm never going to look at him the same way again."

About 5 hours later (Damn DMV lines)…

Second Lady:"Sir!Sir!"

Pietro: (waking up) "No Lance don't put that shirt back on!"

Second Lady: (scared look)"Um…OK.Sir here is the information required to obtain your license." 

Pietro walks off to read the information handed to him.

Pietro: "I have to take a test?!That sucks!"

An hour later…

(I'm lazy so we shall assume he has taken the test)

Pietro:(reading his results)"Alright!I got a D-!"

Person Next to Him:"That's not a good thing."

Pietro:"That's what you think!I passed and that's all that matters!" 

(A/N: It doesn't really matter so HA on all you Drivers Ed. Teachers for saying it mattered!)

Outside the DMV…

Pietro: (Reading through another requirement) "I need 25 hours with an adult?!Who am I gonna get to do that?!I could ask Mystique, but then again sticking needles into my nails would be more fun.I could ask Dad!Wait no…he's got another bizarre scheme for world domination to plan."

Logan randomly walks by eating an ice-cream cone.

Logan:"Ice cream…is there anything better than you? I think not!"

Pietro: "Well the packet never said it had to be MY guardian…just an adult. Mwahahaha!"

Poor Logan doesn't notice Pietro sneaking up on him with a rag and a jar of chloroform because he's too immersed in the ice cream.

Logan: (Pietro puts the rag to Logan's mouth) "What the hell?!"

Logan throws Pietro into a tree.

Pietro:"Ow.I thought this stuff knocked people out!"

Logan:"Try putting the chloroform ON the rag dipshit."

Pietro:"I knew that!"

Logan walks off still eating his ice cream.

Pietro:"Screw this plan.I've got a better one now!"

Pietro pulls out a random piece of rope, (I don't think we want to know where it came from.) and proceeds to tie Logan up with it.

Logan:"My ice cream!"

Pietro:"Silence infidel! You're gonna help me get my drivers license."

Logan:(On the verge of tears) "Ice cream!"

Pietro: (pushing Logan into the passenger seat of a car) "I'll get you more when I'm done!"

Logan:"Woo-hoo!!Hey!This is my car!"

Pietro:"I know, but I just need it to learn to drive."

Logan:"Why couldn't you have kidnapped some else?!"

Pietro:"Well you were to first person I saw."

Logan:"That sucks."

Pietro:"Off we go!"

Logan:"You have to start the car if you want to leave."

Pietro:"I knew that!"

* That's it for now, but I shall write more! *


	3. I don't have a name for it

*I'm baaaaack

*I'm baaaaack!Sorry 'bout the wait peeps.My hard drive crashed and it took a freaking week to fix.Damn computer.And now on with the story! Oh BTW I still own nada*

Adventures at the DMV 

** **

**By: **Princess of Darkness

Logan:"Ok now start the car and GENTLY press the gas pedal."

Pietro:"I can do that."

Pietro starts the car and slams his foot down on the gas.

Logan:"AHHHHHHHH! STOP THE CAR!STOP THE CAR!!"

*THUMP*

Pietro:"Why are you on the windshield?"

Logan:(glares at Pietro) "I told you to gently press the gas."

Pietro:"Oh yeah…I ignored that."

Logan:"Why did you have to kidnap me?!"****

** **

Pietro: (looking into the rearview mirror)"Ooooo!I can look at myself in this mirror!I'm such a stud."

Logan: (hitting his head on the dashboard) "I *THUMP* hate *THUMP* kids."

Pietro:"OK I'm ready to go out on the road.Lets go!"

Both sit there looking at each other.

Logan: "Um…you're driving."

Pietro:"Oh yeah!"

Logan:"Are you like a platinum blonde or something, 'cause it would explain a lot."

Pietro:"Shut up!"

They start driving down the street.

Pietro: "Hey what does that sign say?"

Logan:"It says: _Wrong Way._"

Pietro:"That doesn't apply to me right?"

Logan:"Oh of course not."

Pietro:"Cool!"

Logan:"ARE YOU HIGH!?IT'S CALLED SARCASM!LOOK IT UP!"

Pietro:"So…I can't drive this way?"

Logan: (hitting head on dash board again) "Kill *THUMP* me *THUMP* now."

Pietro:"Hey look!It's a police officer!Why is he chasing me with his lights on?"

Logan:"Pull over the damn car!"

Pietro pulls over the car and the policeman starts to walk up to the car.

Pietro: "Oh shit.I forgot I kidnapped you.If he finds out I'll go to jail!"

Pietro puts a gag in Logan's mouth.

Pietro: "There.That should solve the problem."

Policeman:"Excuse me sir, but are you aware you are going the wrong way on this road?"

Pietro: "Oh yeah.I knew that."

Policeman: *blink blink*"OK then.May I see your license and registration?"

Pietro:"You can see my driving permit, and I'm not sure where the registration is.It's not my car."

Policeman:"Whose car is it then." 

Pietro: (points at Logan) "His."

Policeman:"Why does he have a gag in his mouth?"

Logan: "Mmmffffff!"

Pietro:"Um…uh…"

Logan:"Mmmffffff."

Pietro: (stomps on the gas pedal)"SO LONG PIGGY!MWAHAHAHA!"

The car remains motionless.

Policeman:"Sir, I think you should shift out of park before you try to escape."

Logan: (hitting his head on the dash board) "Mmmffffff *THUMP* mmmffffff"

Pietro:"Damn…I knew I forgot something."

The policeman suddenly turns into [Mystique][1].

Pietro:"AHHHHH!!The boss lady!!"

Logan:"MMMFFFF!!"

Pietro slams on the gas, only this time he remembered to be in drive not park.

Pietro:"That was…odd."

Logan:"Mmmffff?"

Pietro:"Oh yeah the gag."

Pietro removes the gag.

Logan:"That was very strange.Is she like everywhere you guys are?"

Pietro:"I'm beginning to think so."

The two sit in silence for a few minutes.

Logan:"Can you at least turn the radio on?"

Pietro:"OK!"

Pietro turns the radio on and Garth Brooks is blaring.

Pietro:"What the hell is this crap?"

Pietro changes the station.Garth Brooks is playing on it as well.

Pietro:"Don't you have any other types of music?!"

Logan:"But these are the only good types.We got Country AND Western."

Pietro: (shuddering)"I'm putting a good station on."

Pietro changes it yet again.This time it's playing Briteny Spears

Pietro: (singing along)"My loneliness is killing me. I must confess I still believe.When I'm not with you I lose my mind.Give me a sign.Hit me baby one more time!"

Logan hits Pietro.

Pietro:"Ow!Why'd you do that?"

Logan:"You told me to."

Pietro:"Did not."

Logan:"Whatever."

Logan looks out the rear window.

Logan:"Oh shit.We're being followed."

Pietro:"What?!By who?"

Logan:(cowering in fear)"Fangirls"

Pietro:"Oh dear god.Why are they after us?!"

Logan:"Kurt probably gave them the slip so they're after us.Damn that elf."

Pietro:"How do we get out of here?"

Logan:"Step on it!"

They speed away from the fangirls who were chasing them.

Fangirl 1:"Nooooooo!!Logan I love you!"

Fangirl 2:"Don't go Pietro!!COME BACK!"

A few minutes later they had lost the vicious mob of girls.

Pietro:"I can understand them liking me, seeing as I'm just the coolest guy in this town, but why would any like YOU?"

Logan:"Stupid movie version of me. DAMN YOU HUGH JACKMAN!!"

Pietro:"You scare me man."

Logan: (looking out the window) "Where are we exactly?"

Pietro:"Here comes a sign.It'll say where we are."

They pass a sign that says: _Welcome to Oregon._

Logan:"How the hell did we get here?!"

Pietro:"I'm not too sure.Maybe I took a wrong turn at the X-Geek mansion."

Logan:"Oh crap…it's almost two o'clock!"

Pietro:"WHAT?!I'm gonna miss Passions!"

Pietro hops out of the car and runs back to Bayville.

Logan:"Um…hello?Little help here?Still tided up!*Crickets chirp*Hello?Anyone?Damn."

*I'll have another chapter up soon I promise!*

   [1]: http://www.crosswinds.net/~savagedesires/evolution/profiles/myst.html



	4. I have a sugar problem

* OK I know it's been a while since I last put a chapter up…I apologize to anyone who cared and or noticed.My muse picked up and left.I think he's somewhere in Iceland by now.But I have a new muse…and some chocolate covered coffee beans.Heehee…caffeine is my friend. * 

Adventures at the DMV 

** **

Back at the Brotherhood household

Lance:"Hey aren't you supposed to be driving?"

Pietro:"Quiet!Julian is trying to seduce Teresa.NO YOU EVIL DIRTY MAN!YOU LEAVE HER ALONE!"

Lance:"Dude calm down.It's just a soap opera."

Pietro: (glaring at Lance)"I'm going to ignore that comment and assume you are under a lot of stress."

Lance:"But it IS only a TV show."

Pietro runs out of the room while covering his ears with his hands.

Todd:"Yo, what was that about?"

Lance:"He's lost his grip on reality again."

Todd:"I told you to limit his TV intake, but nooo you wouldn't listen to me."

Lance:"You never said that!"

Todd: (Pauses for a moment to think) "Oh yeah!I didn't.My bad."

Any who! I'm a bad and lazy writer so we're just going to fast-forward to Pietro at driving school.

Pietro:"Honestly!Do I really have to be here?I've already gotten my hours on the road!"

Random instructor:"Now young man you need to take the road test.You're in car number 5.Now go on to your car and get started." 

Pietro walks off to his car.

Pietro:"What in the hell are you doing here?!"

Rogue:"To learn to drive what else?"

Pietro:"Yeah but it's just unnatural for you to be here."

Rogue:"Yeah I know…it really doesn't make sense does it?"

Pietro:"And what happened to your accent?"

Rogue:"The author doesn't like to write them because…well she can't."

Pietro:"I see." (Looks at the other person standing by the car) "Ok I understand her being here but why are you?"

Duncan:"Who me?"

Pietro:"No the Neanderthal behind you."

Duncan looks behind him in confusion.

Duncan:"Where?!Where?!"

Pietro and Rogue back away from Duncan.

Pietro:"I was talking about you."

Duncan:"Oh…" (Looks at his feet in shame) "…I failed several driving tests…and decided to do donuts in the principal's lawn."

Rogue: "And you're still alive?!"

But before Duncan can make another inane comment the driving instructor walks over to the car.

Rogue:"Hey I remember you!You're that guy that ruined my plan to kill Kurt-…I uh mean you saved Kurt from my misguided attempts to stay with the Brotherhood."

Pietro: (rolls eyes) "Good save."

Forge:"Indeed I am.But now I'm here to teach you all to drive."

Pietro:"Don't you need to be over 21 to be a driving instructor?"

Forge:"See that's the beauty of it.According to the government I'm like 46.I can buy beer and everything!"

Pietro:"Don't yah just love the government?"

Duncan: (Being the simple-minded football player stereotype we all love) "Ooooo!A mirror!Oh yeah!Who's sexy?That's right it's me."

All pause and stare at Duncan.

Forge:"Any-who!It's time to take the road test!"

Pietro:"Mefirst!Mefirst!Mefirst!!"

Forge:"Fine then!Just get in the car."

All get in the car, well everyone but Duncan who is still staring at the mirror.

Rogue:"Get in the damn car or I won't try to break up Scott and Jean with you!"

Duncan yelps and gets in the car faster than Pietro could.

Pietro: "That's not right! No one is as fast as me!!"

Rogue: "What about Superman?"

Forge: "Or the Flash?"

Pietro: "SHUT UP!! I'M QUICKSILVER AND NO ONE IS AS FAST AS ME!"

Duncan: "Dude what are you guys talking about?"

Pietro:"Shut up and go back to your mirror."

Duncan:"Ok!"

…Meanwhile in Oregon…

Logan:"Hello Mr. Squirrel!How are you today?"

Mr. Squirrel:"…"

Logan:"Really?That bad huh?Well kids can be tuff to handle."

Mr. Squirrel:"…"

Logan:"Yeah anyway…could you please untie me?Please?"

Mr. Squirrel runs off into the woods again.

Logan:"Damn it!"

…And now back to the story…

Pietro is driving the car down a street near the mansion.

Duncan:"Hey it's Jean!Dude pull over the car!!"

Pietro:"But I wanna get my license!" 

Duncan:"Pull over the car or I'll beat the crap out of your smelly friend."

Pietro:"I fail to see the affect it will have on me."

Duncan: "Pull over the damn car!I'll give you money!"

Pietro suddenly stops the car.

*THUMP*

Rogue:"Did you have to that?!"

Pietro: (grinning)"Yeah I did."

Duncan:"Hey Jean."

Jean: (walking up to the car)"Hey Duncan…and you other people."

Rogue:*cough* "Skank" *cough*

Jean:"What?"

Rogue:"Oh nothing."

Duncan:"Whatcha doing?"

Jean:"Oh!Logan's gone missing and Professor X wants us to put these missing posters up…" (looks over at Pietro) "…Pietro why are you laughing?"

Pietro:"No reason."

Jean: (being the moronic skank that she is) "Ok then."

((A/N:::dodges tomatoes being thrown by Jean fans::Pease don't hunt me down…I just really don't like her you can all blame the movie version of Jean for this.))

Pietro: "Ok we're leaving now."

…Meanwhile back with Logan…

Logan: "We just figured out Blue's clues, we just figured out Blue's clues, we just figured out Blue's clues, because we're really smart!"

…And now back to Pietro…

Pietro: "Ok did I pass the damn test or not?"

Forge: (waking up.) "Huh? Wha? Were you driving?"

Pietro: (hitting his head on the steering wheel) "I *HONK* QUIT."

…Back at the Brotherhood…

Lance:"So Pietro…Did you get a license or not?"

Pietro:"Indeed I did!" 

Pietro holds up a license for the others to see.

Todd:"Hey!That's a fake!"

Pietro:"I know."

Fred:"Then why did you go through all that crap?"

Pietro:"Boredom?"

All 'cept Pietro fall over anime style.

THE END

Yes I know that was a bad ending…you have permission to flame away.Damn coffee beans.It's their fault.


End file.
